gone

its not often i see the people i love
gone off somewhere doing whatever such and such
i hope they dont miss me when i'm gone
or look back and say 'i wish i spent more time with ----'
death can't be reversed
i cherish the time i have with mom and B
I still can't believe it took so long for me to see
the me that i've always wanted to be
In 2009, i lost 7 friends within 2 months
yet, i'm glad i had the time i had with them
they made me laugh,
told me stories of their past
their memory i carry
forever it will last
I once asked a man,
whom was married for 60+ years,
i saw his wife's life pass away
as the years went by,
'knowing that your wife would die, as she did...would you do it all over again?'
i said very patient
he looked at me smiled
and said 'yes'
i could see he had no regret
he lived his live
loved his wife until the end
.........
hold those close to your heart near
let them know every time you see them they are missed
as one day....we will all be gone...

the same

we are the same humans today
that we were thousands of years ago
needing: food, water, air and shelter
everywhere we go
these rules haven't changed
but somehow
part of us has
we strive to out-do one another
for selfish pleasures
from our fellow sisters and brothers
yet we are still the same
generation after generation
the gene pool multiplied
a complex mathematical equation
that started with the original one
do you not see?
we are the same

funds

a day has yet to pass
that i hear people complain about cash
they buy buy buy
and spend spend spend
a vacuum of consumption
a bag without limit
filling their lives
with nothing but useless bullshit
all 'pre-landfill' goods
moved from one location to another
its always 'i need it'
never 'i want it'
someone asked 'whats the most precious good'
...air....thats what i need the most
food and water follow

legacy

many people speak of a legacy
'i want to be remembered' they say
i have yet to find out why
is it the ego?
is it the 'i'm better than you?'

little girl

her father never bothered
her mother never tries
alone to wander the world
with only her uncle and gma by her side
whom to look up to?
whom footsteps to follow?
no girls nights out
no sleep over parties
no one to share secrets with
no one to play with
its such a struggle
i dont 'know' girly things
our minds are different
man/women evolve with different thoughts
i take her to do girly things
why the pho not!

samurai

to serve for a greater cause
die for this little one
i've chosen to try my best
not live in shame
bring comfort when she's down
hold her when in pain
i'll never let her know
what it is i can do
how far i will go
to help pull her through
as i samurai i bow to her
my life at her command
mind is strong
heart loves with all its might
i will die at your feet
any given night

image

visions of you
left imprinted on my mind
are the only reminder i have
of those good times
brings joy to my heart
smiles to my face
a chemical path you've created
just an image of your face
i can see it as clear as day
even on the darkest nights
its my warmth when i'm cold
an extra beat of the heart
thoughts of you will last forever
miss you when apart

ego

what is the ego?
why does it exist?
whom creates it?
its the 'me' we want to be
the me that we are not
the 'me' that is an abyss
its the 'me' that always insists
without vision
would the ego exist?
are we ungrateful for what we're given?
as all we do is try to fill the mental void
an unhappiness that doesn't exist
but only in one's mind

egg or cocoon

it seems to me
that as time passes by
we grow into something
from the inside
its always been there
filtering out all the bull
breaking free of the egg shell
ripping open our cocoon
world seems brighter
smiles get larger
we seem more
hear less crap
come into awareness
back to the cocoon/egg shell
i'll never go back
as you look around
so many are still stuck
unable to break free
simply put...shit outta luck
lost in the matrix
trapped by the mind
passing by the flowers
all the beauty of this world

torpedo

the words came out
but they did not register
they floated in your mind
almost lost in there forever
till the day it made contact
sparked an instant thought
reality of life
one you had never thought
it began a change
one that takes time
one that will forever
change your thoughts of mind
the world will seem different
yet all is still the same
it is we whom evolve
it is we whom need to change

distance

time has past
with each blink
i sit and ponder
the thinks i think
why we've become
the 'we'
we are now
further away from one another
in our distant towns
we lived
like sister and brother
as we aged
we forgot
whom we
once were
family that survived
family we are not

she keeps on passing me by...

pharcyde said it best...

the ones that pass me by
day after day
i see these cats staring
without a thing to say
wonder what they think
i become a blur
imprinted in the minds
thoughts over come her
i don't even bother
not sure why i should
just another cat
looking at me like food
something to ride
fuck or suck
a simple escape
mental nip & tuck
the lives they live
day after day
thinking in the past
without a word to say

70th !

it says i have 69 posts....funni

cracked open like an egg
my thoughts spill out
poured all over this page
that my fingers type out
written in such a fashion
that some 'might' understand
just a spirit in the flesh
like every fellow man
a combination of words
have brought me this far
but it wasn't the mind that wrote this
was the awareness and awe
i live in time
not in the past
always moving forward
standing still as you pass
we never actually move
nor do we stop
atoms bouncing around
with each tick of the clock
winds pass by
but can never be seen
only felt by the mind
and the flesh in between

The mind

As the days progress I learn more about myself,
Ive learned that all the things I need are: food, water, oxygen and minimal shelter
Everything else is the mind simply trying to fill an empty hole of ‘wants’
The mind actually reminds me of Haiti
A place filled with madness, restlessness to no end
Yet,
Everyday it strives to fill those voids…somehow
I can say without honesty that I have far more shit than I will ever need in life
The mind is everyone’s #1 problem
It has taken me years to find reality
Its not what we see, touch, smell, hear or taste
Those are simply the mind responding to ‘stimulants’
I,
Without a doubt,
Feel alone

grateful

the simplicities of life
unravel everyday
the ability to open ones eyes
stretch's ones limbs
great the new day
with a messed up head of hair
most of us take it for granted
honestly far more than less
to be grateful for what we have
thankful for every thought
the ability to type these words
so you can read them
and mind process them
and somehow make sense of it
even if
it doesn't make any sense
i'm grateful for every molecule of air
every blink of an eye
heartbeats
and love

energy

it is lost
it is gained
vast amounts of energy
consumed and drained
we can direct its path
use it to solve math
unaware of its task
with each and every blink
even with the tiniest of thoughts
the slightest of thinks
its what makes us 'us'
crates us into 'us'
pointed toward a particular direction
bound or bust

the step

would you believe me if i told you
i'd leave it all behind
to have you by my side
until the end of time
that on my last breathe
your the only face i wish to see
i could go into the afterlife
blissfully
i wonder where you are
and we will be 'us'
sad, lonely,
heart full of rust
i've endured some pain
felt like i had died
my heart still pounds
with you only you on my mind

breathe...

happens without notice
keeps us alive
simple act of breathing
oxygen to body n mind
beyond 'just that'
an awareness which changes you
you see another realm
which few step into
it is not the 'I'
it is 'being'
life on record
never stopping to repeated/play it
flowers seem more vibrant
scents so intoxicating
not sure how i live before
thankful i can breath
just this once more...

girls...

not a day goes by
i don't see a great face
legs, ass and tits,
all over the place,
to catch a women's eye,
she's unable to look away,
but i never bother,
cause none are going my way,
the best is when their with their man,
makes you smile as in a laugh,
poor guy ain't takin care of biz,
she should just leave his ass,
not sure why i dont bother,
most times not in the mood,
just a man passin by,
thought i'd give you a glance

lightining

we swapped positions
as she panted out of breathe,
the covers were on the floor,
her hair all a mess,
a strike of lightning,
lit the earth,
the curves of her body,
made my heart beat faster,
racing blood to my member,
that was titanium hard,
we tangled arms,
with a soft warm embrace,
she knew i wanted her,
i needed her taste,
as we melted away,
in each others arms,
the pain of world,
couldn't have done us any harm,
she straddled herself in,
and i slide deep inside,
lightning struck again,
her face with nothing but seductive smile

stepping back in time

as the moons have past,
as the winters have gone by,
i've learned and evolved
sometimes even high,
i always believed this,
then it turned into that,
going back in forth,
in circles like a revolving door,
but it all changed,
and the reality finally sunk,
that we're doing things all wrong,
in a state of mental sin,
we crave more
and more and more
emptying out our pockets
to the emptiness of more
many without hope
drunk in a constant crave
of the materialities of life,
which has put us in a daze,
roaming the earth confused,
as we work night and day
to fill that empty hole
day after day after day after day...

positive male role models

How does one become something he's never known?
My dad was close to worthless,
came around when he pleased,
let me down more times humanly imaginable,
I'm trying my best,
With the one i hold close to my heart,
but i feel like its simply never enough,
seems like i should do more,
go here go there,
show her the world every which where,
but i just dont know how,
nor do i know how to,
i've always lived by example,
if i could see it,
i could be it,
but i'm still
time and time again
unknowing how....

the economy

It really blows my mind of the lack that people understand,
Current situation of the economy is far beyond the understand of the 'typical' citizen,
As a fan of economics I can tell you the answer isn't simple,
Its an accumulation of all that happens,
Locally, state-wide, across the US, and stretching to the smallest of towns in the most emptiest of countries,
One must understand indicators as they show the direction of whats going on and which way were headed,
If you thought things were bad,
Its going to be a long while before we get out,
Gets worse before it gets better,
Inflation hasn't kicked in yet in china (just to name one) and other growing markets,
Commodity prices are going to continue to rise (cotton alone has tripled in 6 months! Third world countries struggle with this the most, which is why the US sends billions of dollars in aid to other countries...and people wonder where the trillion + dollar deficit comes from...again just a fraction of the equation),
The only way to fix this problem is to go backwards,
Back to when railroads were the main means of transportation for goods (it would remove mack trucks from crossing state lines and keep $$$ for those costs in state) by creating major city hubs for goods drop offs,
Going back to farming and feeding both the US (first!) then the world (we would also be better able to control food safety!!)
Start up 'green' factories for the future of energy, fuel, commodities and goods,
US has everything it needs to survive on its own (Japan alone imports far beyond its means vs. its exports yet its economy is far beyond the US's),
US needs to utilize its land and punish banks and people for the havoc they have caused!!
China is the new superpower!!!
Yet, shit hasn't hit the fan there yet!!
Being a communist country they have 'pegged' their currency vs the dollar @ 64 to 1, once these currency is able to float around the globe like the Euro, Yen, Pound, Dollar, and others...everything will change,
China has increased their interest rates to slow down the booming economy and rising inflation but the problem persists,
China sets its own fuel prices!! How nice is that!!
Once everything changes in China where will everything be made then?
Will the 'Made in China' sticker still exist?
Which third world country will the globe turn to and help grown next?
There is a bumpy road ahead,
Better make sure your life's vehicle can withstand whats in store for us

puzzle pieces

while lying in bed,
my arms around your frame,
pieces of our body align,
as i fit right in place,
softness of your skin,
aroma of your scent,
a body so lovely,
when the skin is bare,
comfort over whelms me,
and the mind comes to ease,
time no longer exists,
as each breath passes,
sheets shelter our bodies,
bed just a cushion,
i feel the moisture engulf me,
as i slowly start to push in,

flux in time

Many moons ago,
when i was always lite,
dated this one cat,
our love was the shit,
she was one of the best,
in every which way,
never gave up,
she has there to stay,
we split ways,
after i fucked up,
100 miles away,
I was shit outta luck,
many winters passed,
she got married,
and now shes in misery,
married but sad and lonely,
shes dug herself a hole,
which she made herself,
unable to see the light,
she cries day and night,
I'm too far to help,
she doesn't know what to do,
yet she yearns for a love,
one that takes away the blue